For some reason at 3:14 on a Friday morning (Could be 5:14 where Jimmy’s Seafood is, not sure how time zones work on twitter), a Seafood restaurant owned by some guy name Jimmy decided to throw a little gas on a fire and showed picture of some scrumptious looking crustaceans. It should be noted that said crustaceans were in fact dead. My research tells me Jimmy’s Seafood resides in Maryland, and that they are also Marylands Authority on Crab Cakes. A bold claim indeed, but I won’t dispute it, seeing as I’ve never been.
I have to admit, I’m usually not a fan of randomly picking fights with people like P.E.T.A. Like when a while back PETA (I’m tired of typing out the periods. It’s PETA henceforth) had that facebook filter for you to put over your profile picture with a pet, and people put it over animals they killed hunting. I have nothing against hunting, and enjoy the activity, but that’s a hardo move through and through. We get it. You kill animals, and don’t like PETA because they don’t like you because you kill animals. Whatever. Tight.
So was Jimmy’s Seafood out of the blue calling out PETA unnecessary? Yea, probably. But…I’ll say this. One thing I hate more than hardo’s, are self-righteous ass-holes who try to project their beliefs on you. Be it vegans, religious folk, or that one hockey fan in your group who brings it up constantly because he wants people to like it. Look. I don’t care what you do, think, or say as long as it doesn’t bother me.
PETA and its followers, unfortunately are notorious for pushing their values on other people.
Let’s see how they responded.
Pretty innocuous response. I’ll admit, at this point I’m #TeamPETA. They’re attempting to be the bigger man at this point, choosing not to preach or respond in a nasty manner, and didn’t even demand a stop to killing crabs. They merely offered an option of a vegan seafood dish (which I’m positive doesn’t exist, but that’s beside the point.)
The mistake PETA made here though, was the words “No one wants to be boiled alive”, because that was the opening Jimmy’s needed.
Unfortunately for PETA, Jimmy’s kept the receipts. You know when you’re pissed at someone, but things are amicable at the moment so, while you’d love to blow up on them, you don’t really have the chance? So what you do is try to get them to say something first? Give yourself a little opening and a reason to express your original anger. Ding. Ding. Ding. That’s what we got here.
Jimmy’s understandably hates PETA and wanted to call them out, they just needed the animal lovers to take the bait first. Well, they did. And they went for a ride indeed.
Bad news for PETA too. The rest of the engagement looked something like this.
PETA, similar to the pale guy in the gif never punched back after the initial blow. I don’t think it was because they were trying to be the better man at this point, I think it was because they got the lights dimmed with a massive right hook with Jimmy calling them hypocrites. At this point, I switched my side and I’m fully on #TeamJimmy and would like to apologize for calling the hardo’s in my head earlier because honestly PETA needed this to happen to them.
The good news for us, is that it doesn’t stop there.
Ohhhhhhhh fuck. Someone stop the damn fight.
Nothing worse than a hypocrite. Well, actually there is.
PETA needed to respond to this. They got their ass called out, and if they’re going to go down, they needed one more swing.
So what did they do? They pulled the most 2018 response possible and called #FakeNews.
The only issue however, is that their “real source” they threw out in return?
IT CAME FROM THEIR OWN FUCKING WEBSITE.
Just a wild move. It’s like Alex Jones proving Hillary Clinton eats babies with an article off of infowars.com
Jimmy kindly points out to them a source unrelated to the argument, and the poor poor people of PETA are now face down on the mat. The bell has rung, the ref has Jimmy’s Seafood’s hand in the middle of the ring, and the P.A guy lets the world know that via Knockout, Jimmy’s Seafood is the NEW undisputed champion of the world.
Raise that belt Jimmy. Raise it high.